Self-Care or Self-Comfort? And Why Does the Difference Matter?
Everyone talks about self-care, but not many truly understand what it means. Often, we confuse self-care with self-comfort — and that mix-up can do more harm than good. Here, I’ll help you spot the difference and avoid falling into unintentional self-comfort.
What is self-comfort?
Self-comfort is when we avoid difficult emotions by distracting ourselves — it could be through work, Netflix, scrolling social media, or even being productive. The key difference? Self-comfort is about escape, not about feeling or processing what’s really going on inside. It feels good in the moment, but the avoided feelings don’t disappear — they often return stronger, bringing added stress, headaches, or insomnia. Over time, avoidance can stall personal growth, damage relationships, and deepen emotional discomfort.
What is self-care?
Self-care means facing those difficult feelings with kindness and attention. It might look like journaling, talking to a friend, or any activity that helps you reflect and accept your emotions. Self-care allows you to understand what you truly want and what aligns with your values, so you can make choices that feel right for you. Whether it’s a quiet walk, mindful skincare, a gentle yoga class, or creative expression, the goal is to create space for honest connection with yourself.
How do we avoid spiralling when facing hard emotions?
Many fear that facing tough feelings will lead to endless sadness, but ironically, avoiding them is what keeps us stuck. Leaning into those emotions, bit by bit, helps release that weight and brings clarity and peace over time.
Why is choosing self-care important?
Choosing self-care isn’t always easy — it takes intention and practice. But even small moments can shift the tide. Try this quick exercise: place your hand where you feel discomfort (heart, stomach, throat), take a deep breath, exhale slowly, and notice any changes. These tiny acts build awareness, helping you move forward with intention instead of autopilot.
Lastly, it’s okay to comfort yourself, especially when you’re freshly overwhelmed. It’s a natural way to regroup. Just be mindful not to let comfort become a long-term avoidance. Notice when it’s helping, and when it might be holding you back from healing.
Self-care is a journey, not a perfect destination. It’s about learning to hold yourself gently, even in the hard moments. I’m here to remind you that even the smallest step toward truly caring for yourself is a powerful act of love and growth. Keep going — you’re doing better than you think.